Tales of The Captain

Groggily rolling over in my sleep, trying to hold onto the dregs of my latest dream I wake up  to a yelp with my knee in The Captain's butt.

The Captain, voice filled with dismay:  You kneed me!  Why did you knee me?

Me:  Whaaa?

The Captain:  Jess, you just kneed me in the ass, full force!  It hurt like hell!

Me:  I did what?

The Captain:  You slammed.  Your knee.  Into my ass.

Me:  *coming awake and registering what he's actually saying*  Long pause, then....  Bwuuahhhahahahaha!

The Captain, huffily:  Stop laughing.  It's not funny.

Me:  Oooooh hohohohoho!  EEeehehehehe!

The Captain, testily:  Shut up.  It's not funny.  It hurts.

Me:  Okay, I'm sorry.  *snort, giggle, giggle*  I'll stop.  *face in pillow, deep breaths*

The Captain:  Thank God I wasn't facing the other way.

Long pause...

Me:  Bwuuahhahahahaa!